Well Dave the dead beat dad is now quitting his OTR Trucking job that he has with Prime and going to move back to Springfield. He has met a woman (Angie) online who lives here and she wants him to quit and find a job here. He came into town on Thursday and finally found some time to see his son Saturday night at 9:30 pm for 30 minutes. Then he did see him again on Sunday for about 3 hours. At first thought he wanted me to meet him down town at one of the museums. I told him no that he should come and get Carter and the two of them spend some quality time together. He said well doesn't he still need a car seat. I told him I would let him borrow one of mine. He said he didn't have room that his Angie's back seat was full. I told him to move things around… He said he would get back to me. Well he finally got Carter and told me he was going to take him to Chuck E Cheese. Well when they got back home I found out Dave went and picked up his Angie's 10 yr old son and took them both to go play miniature golf since Angie was working. Carter was so excited to go with his Dad and was also so excited when he came home. He said he and Curtis had a blast. Carter told me that his Dad told him that now on his stay home days he can go spend then night over there with them and Curtis and they can play and have fun. So now 1.5 years later he is wanting his visitation??? What the heck…. Why now… cause there is some woman in the picture who isn't crazy like Lisa was and who would take care of Carter… and wants Carter in the picture. He is going to play the whole Disney land dad thing and it makes me mad. So today he is out looking for a local trucking job and he is going to live with Angie and her kids. She has one that is 10 and he may be the only one that lives at home… I think they rest are older.
One thing that really upset me and I don’t' know why I let it get to me was as Carter, Dave and myself were sitting at Wendy's Saturday night Dave said to me "I am really going to grow up this time" I just looked at him and he said "you don't believe me do you" I told him while trying unsuccessfully to hold back the tears I wish you would have done that for US. Ugh…. Why did I let that get to me, why did I let my emotions show. I don’t' want him back, I am better now so why did that hurt so bad.
I am being selfish, but I don't want to share my son with him and his new family. I don't want to have to let him go over there every other weekend and share holidays. I don't share well…. I know it is what is best for Carter and that he needs his Dad in his life and he was so excited to spend time with him. But damn it… I want him all to myself.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
March update
Hello!
This is going to be just a brief update cause there is not much going on.
As you all know I broke it off with Michael last month. It was hard, but deep down I know it was the right thing to do. He is an amazing man, but I just didn't have the right kind of magical feelings for him. I have talked to him a few times through email and he seems to be doing well… which makes me happy. That was the hardest part about breaking it off with him was worrying about how he would take it and that I would hurt him in the end. I have never ever broken up with anyone. It has ALWAYS been the other way around and I am always the one hurt and wondering why.
I am not seeing anyone at the current time… don't even have anyone I am talking to either. There is one guy that I just dream and have one of those high school crushes on. LOL I don't think I am his type though.
Carter is doing well. He is loving the nicer weather and the ability to get outside and play with his friends. They were outside almost all weekend playing. His school had a fun fair this weekend and Carter had lots of fun. I can't believe that his kindergarten year is almost over. My baby is growing up way to fast… before I know it he will be a senior in high school.
Now when my friend had a psychic party not to long ago the psychic lady told me that I was going to meet someone who's name starts with the letter "J" and that he is my soul mate. She stated that I would get pregnant without having to use fertility treatment and that we would get married too. She told me I would have a baby girl. So anyways… Carter more then one time has told me that he is going to be a big brother and that I am going to have another baby sometime. I've asked him who the daddy of the baby will be and at times he says he doesn't know yet…. Then times he said well my daddy could be the daddy.
Speaking of Carter's daddy… he is still driving a truck. He sent me a text message a little over a week ago and asked me if it would be to awkward for me if he asked me for dating advice. I told him no it would be weird, but I would be okay with it. Basically I was just nosey and wanted to know!! LOL Anyways, He had three women that he was trying to choose between and wanted my opinion on which one he should date more exclusively. I asked him if they all knew about each other and he said no…. I told him that he was going to get himself in trouble if he wasn't careful. He will NEVER change. As hard as it was leaving him I am so thankful now.
This is going to be just a brief update cause there is not much going on.
As you all know I broke it off with Michael last month. It was hard, but deep down I know it was the right thing to do. He is an amazing man, but I just didn't have the right kind of magical feelings for him. I have talked to him a few times through email and he seems to be doing well… which makes me happy. That was the hardest part about breaking it off with him was worrying about how he would take it and that I would hurt him in the end. I have never ever broken up with anyone. It has ALWAYS been the other way around and I am always the one hurt and wondering why.
I am not seeing anyone at the current time… don't even have anyone I am talking to either. There is one guy that I just dream and have one of those high school crushes on. LOL I don't think I am his type though.
Carter is doing well. He is loving the nicer weather and the ability to get outside and play with his friends. They were outside almost all weekend playing. His school had a fun fair this weekend and Carter had lots of fun. I can't believe that his kindergarten year is almost over. My baby is growing up way to fast… before I know it he will be a senior in high school.
Now when my friend had a psychic party not to long ago the psychic lady told me that I was going to meet someone who's name starts with the letter "J" and that he is my soul mate. She stated that I would get pregnant without having to use fertility treatment and that we would get married too. She told me I would have a baby girl. So anyways… Carter more then one time has told me that he is going to be a big brother and that I am going to have another baby sometime. I've asked him who the daddy of the baby will be and at times he says he doesn't know yet…. Then times he said well my daddy could be the daddy.
Speaking of Carter's daddy… he is still driving a truck. He sent me a text message a little over a week ago and asked me if it would be to awkward for me if he asked me for dating advice. I told him no it would be weird, but I would be okay with it. Basically I was just nosey and wanted to know!! LOL Anyways, He had three women that he was trying to choose between and wanted my opinion on which one he should date more exclusively. I asked him if they all knew about each other and he said no…. I told him that he was going to get himself in trouble if he wasn't careful. He will NEVER change. As hard as it was leaving him I am so thankful now.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
It's been awhile…
It's been awhile…
Well we now into our second month of 2009 and I haven't updated in awhile.
Carter is doing really well in school. They evaluate the kids on their reading ability and at the beginning of kindergarten they are to be around a 0 and by the end of kindergarten they are to be at a 3 and that will have them ready for 1st grade. Well Carter is already at a three and we are just a little past half way through the year. I myself had to have help when I was in grade school so I am VERY proud of him! His report cards have all been very good too.
Last week I finally started getting child support again. I hadn't received any since October 6th. The amount I got last week was the original amount that the judge order, but since he is delinquent by over $2000 he owes me an extra $17 each week until he gets his all his back child support paid off. I have called and am getting the amended withholding order sent to his employer so that I start getting back support too.
Dave is still doing the over the road truck driving and he says he loves it. He still is trying to get me back and says I was his true love and he loves me…. Well it's a little to late now to finally be realizing that. I will always love that man, but don't worry I will never ever take him back.
Michael, Carter and I went to St. Louis for the weekend. We stayed at a hotel for 2 nights and took Carter to the Magic House and to the City Museum. Although Carter says his favorite part was swimming at the hotel. ;-) Besides having a great time and getting away my goal on the trip was to see if spending that much time with Michael would get me those 'I can't live without you' feelings. We have been dating for 6 months and although he is an amazing man to both Carter and myself I just didn't have those kind of feelings for him yet. Well the trip was great, but I still didn't get that great connection or those amazing feelings. My feelings for him are a loving caring kind of friendship feelings instead of a lover type feelings. He new going to St. Louis what my feelings were and what I wanted to try and get out of the trip. I have been nothing but honest with him from the start. So on the way home he asked me if I was still confused and what my feelings were. So I was completely honest with him and told him that he wasn't the one for me. I told him there was nothing he did wrong and that he is a great guy and that I didn't want to hold him back anymore. I hated to have to do it, but know it was the right thing to do. ;-(
Well we now into our second month of 2009 and I haven't updated in awhile.
Carter is doing really well in school. They evaluate the kids on their reading ability and at the beginning of kindergarten they are to be around a 0 and by the end of kindergarten they are to be at a 3 and that will have them ready for 1st grade. Well Carter is already at a three and we are just a little past half way through the year. I myself had to have help when I was in grade school so I am VERY proud of him! His report cards have all been very good too.
Last week I finally started getting child support again. I hadn't received any since October 6th. The amount I got last week was the original amount that the judge order, but since he is delinquent by over $2000 he owes me an extra $17 each week until he gets his all his back child support paid off. I have called and am getting the amended withholding order sent to his employer so that I start getting back support too.
Dave is still doing the over the road truck driving and he says he loves it. He still is trying to get me back and says I was his true love and he loves me…. Well it's a little to late now to finally be realizing that. I will always love that man, but don't worry I will never ever take him back.
Michael, Carter and I went to St. Louis for the weekend. We stayed at a hotel for 2 nights and took Carter to the Magic House and to the City Museum. Although Carter says his favorite part was swimming at the hotel. ;-) Besides having a great time and getting away my goal on the trip was to see if spending that much time with Michael would get me those 'I can't live without you' feelings. We have been dating for 6 months and although he is an amazing man to both Carter and myself I just didn't have those kind of feelings for him yet. Well the trip was great, but I still didn't get that great connection or those amazing feelings. My feelings for him are a loving caring kind of friendship feelings instead of a lover type feelings. He new going to St. Louis what my feelings were and what I wanted to try and get out of the trip. I have been nothing but honest with him from the start. So on the way home he asked me if I was still confused and what my feelings were. So I was completely honest with him and told him that he wasn't the one for me. I told him there was nothing he did wrong and that he is a great guy and that I didn't want to hold him back anymore. I hated to have to do it, but know it was the right thing to do. ;-(
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
2008... Wow, what a year!!
2008…. Wow, what a year!
(Warning… this is going to be long)
Well who would have ever thought that 2008 would be such a significant year in my life. You see back in 2007 I though that I was happily married, settled down with my husband and our son. Then in November at the end of ’07 I found him looking else where for love… he said I didn’t make him feel like he was my #1. Well let me tell you he was. He and Carter were my life. Boy how that has changed in ’08! Now I live for my wonderful son and myself. My world no longer revolves around him. I no longer have live with a suspicious mind all the time. Yes I do miss having a family of my own and I do miss that fact that Carter’s dad is no longer involved with his daily life. Carter had a really rough time in the beginning, but he has adjusted well now.
So I filed for divorce and it was granted on June 3, 2008. I officially became a single mom. I was granted child support in the amount of $85 a week. Now that doesn’t even cover half of the daycare, school lunches, sports, clothing, insurance and feeding our son. I sporadically received child support payments… I am again in a dry spell and haven’t gotten a payment since October 6th. So trying to raise a child with out any help has been trying at times, but we again are surviving. Thank goodness I still am living at my parents. I honestly wish that I could afford to move out and for Carter and I to have a place we could call our own. It saddens me every day that I myself can’t provide everything for my son… I do thank the Lord above everyday for giving me my wonderful son… he has saved my life. I also thank him for my parents who provide a roof over our heads and their loving support.
Dave has continued to hop from job to job and living arrangements. As of right now he and Lisa are again separated. Just like the many times before he says it’s for good. He has again gone to Spfld, MO to try OTR truck driving. So far he is sticking with it this time. He says he loves it. It is something he always said he wanted to do. Hopefully now I will start getting child support as soon as he is done with training and gets on their payroll.
I myself am still working two jobs. I still work at General Casualty full time and Lifestar Ambulance part time. There is talk of our Springfield branch office of General Casualty being closed. They have gone to an almost paperless environment and everything is going to image right. They have also been consolidating a lot of the jobs into either home office or regional offices. Slowly all of the jobs are being eliminated. It really scares me… what would I do without the insurance, the amount of time off I get and the pay. I couldn’t go somewhere else and start making what I do here. I could always go to Lifestar full time, but the insurance there sucks… and I would be on shift 24 and off 48. That would be hard being a single mom.
Well I thought I was ready to start getting out there in the dating world. I had already been set up by a joint friend with a wonderful guy who worked for the Illinois Secretary of State office in the IT dept. He had never been married and didn’t have any children of his own. He lived in a nice house in the country by Salisbury that had lots of land. He was just getting out of a long relationship with a girl I think he still loved…I too was just getting out of my marriage… actually was still legally married, so things just didn’t work out with us like I wished they had. So I waited some time and then at the end of July I joined some of the online dating sites. I met a really nice guy on eHarmony. He came from a wonderful family who’s parents were still together. He had a great job that he loves working at IEPA as an environmental engineer and was a manager with a bunch of engineers under him. So, he was able to support himself and had a beautiful house with a pool by Washington Park. Sounds great… a lot of the stuff I am looking for in a relationship. Well, we went on only one date and just as I imagined it all seemed to good to be true and work out for me.
I also met a nice guy on Match.com… his name is Michael. Michael works at Lowes Dept Store, and he lives with his Grandma in her house. We went on our first date on August 6th and went to dinner and a movie. After our first date I just didn’t feel a connection to him at all. I told him that I thought maybe I just wasn’t ready to date. We continued to talk and he is the nicest guy I have met in a long time. He is very thoughtful and caring. So I decided to give it another try! I was really scared to let my guard down and face the possibility of falling in love again. I was also scared by the similarities to Dave. Michael and Dave both came from the same kind of childhoods where neither one of them knew their dads growing up, both were raised mainly by their grandmothers. We have continued to see each other and have even went away for a night to St. Louis to see a Cardinals game. I got the tickets from work and I paid for the hotel down there. Michael drove and paid for the gas. It was a nice getaway! I told him though while down there that I still was leery about our relationship. I told him I was scared of letting him get to close because I was afraid of him getting hurt while I am trying to figure out what it is I want. We continued to see each other occasionally and talk or text daily. So here we are coming up on 5 months and I still feel like I don’t know what it is I exactly want. I am still so afraid of hurting him. I don’t want to continue to lead him on and see him get hurt. He truly is one of the nicest guys I have ever met. Why can’t feel this great connection with him. I thought over time it would happen. What is wrong with me??? I finally let him meet Carter and he treats him wonderfully…. I couldn’t ask for anything better. His Grandmother, Aunt, and Mother all have welcomed Carter and I into their lives with open arms. I don’t want to hurt them either. Maybe it's cause we don't spend a lot of time together... since he works at Lowes he has to work alot of nights and weekends, then he has bowling 2 nights a week, then add me working a second job at Lifestar. Plus the fact that he lives at his Grandmothers house and I live at my parents house still we dont' get much alone time. I don't know... Why can’t I decide what it is that is wrong with me. Why don’t I feel this great connection??? He is a wonderful guy… WHY??? I am so scared that maybe we aren't meant for each other and of hurting him in the end.
Well that is about it for now… Not sure how many people read this as I know some have said they lost the link to it, but if you are still reading thank you for toughing it out and reading this entirely to long of a blog entry. ;-)
I hope ya’ all had a very Merry Christmas (Carter and I did) and have a wonderful New Year!!!
Love to all
Michelle
(Warning… this is going to be long)
Well who would have ever thought that 2008 would be such a significant year in my life. You see back in 2007 I though that I was happily married, settled down with my husband and our son. Then in November at the end of ’07 I found him looking else where for love… he said I didn’t make him feel like he was my #1. Well let me tell you he was. He and Carter were my life. Boy how that has changed in ’08! Now I live for my wonderful son and myself. My world no longer revolves around him. I no longer have live with a suspicious mind all the time. Yes I do miss having a family of my own and I do miss that fact that Carter’s dad is no longer involved with his daily life. Carter had a really rough time in the beginning, but he has adjusted well now.
So I filed for divorce and it was granted on June 3, 2008. I officially became a single mom. I was granted child support in the amount of $85 a week. Now that doesn’t even cover half of the daycare, school lunches, sports, clothing, insurance and feeding our son. I sporadically received child support payments… I am again in a dry spell and haven’t gotten a payment since October 6th. So trying to raise a child with out any help has been trying at times, but we again are surviving. Thank goodness I still am living at my parents. I honestly wish that I could afford to move out and for Carter and I to have a place we could call our own. It saddens me every day that I myself can’t provide everything for my son… I do thank the Lord above everyday for giving me my wonderful son… he has saved my life. I also thank him for my parents who provide a roof over our heads and their loving support.
Dave has continued to hop from job to job and living arrangements. As of right now he and Lisa are again separated. Just like the many times before he says it’s for good. He has again gone to Spfld, MO to try OTR truck driving. So far he is sticking with it this time. He says he loves it. It is something he always said he wanted to do. Hopefully now I will start getting child support as soon as he is done with training and gets on their payroll.
I myself am still working two jobs. I still work at General Casualty full time and Lifestar Ambulance part time. There is talk of our Springfield branch office of General Casualty being closed. They have gone to an almost paperless environment and everything is going to image right. They have also been consolidating a lot of the jobs into either home office or regional offices. Slowly all of the jobs are being eliminated. It really scares me… what would I do without the insurance, the amount of time off I get and the pay. I couldn’t go somewhere else and start making what I do here. I could always go to Lifestar full time, but the insurance there sucks… and I would be on shift 24 and off 48. That would be hard being a single mom.
Well I thought I was ready to start getting out there in the dating world. I had already been set up by a joint friend with a wonderful guy who worked for the Illinois Secretary of State office in the IT dept. He had never been married and didn’t have any children of his own. He lived in a nice house in the country by Salisbury that had lots of land. He was just getting out of a long relationship with a girl I think he still loved…I too was just getting out of my marriage… actually was still legally married, so things just didn’t work out with us like I wished they had. So I waited some time and then at the end of July I joined some of the online dating sites. I met a really nice guy on eHarmony. He came from a wonderful family who’s parents were still together. He had a great job that he loves working at IEPA as an environmental engineer and was a manager with a bunch of engineers under him. So, he was able to support himself and had a beautiful house with a pool by Washington Park. Sounds great… a lot of the stuff I am looking for in a relationship. Well, we went on only one date and just as I imagined it all seemed to good to be true and work out for me.
I also met a nice guy on Match.com… his name is Michael. Michael works at Lowes Dept Store, and he lives with his Grandma in her house. We went on our first date on August 6th and went to dinner and a movie. After our first date I just didn’t feel a connection to him at all. I told him that I thought maybe I just wasn’t ready to date. We continued to talk and he is the nicest guy I have met in a long time. He is very thoughtful and caring. So I decided to give it another try! I was really scared to let my guard down and face the possibility of falling in love again. I was also scared by the similarities to Dave. Michael and Dave both came from the same kind of childhoods where neither one of them knew their dads growing up, both were raised mainly by their grandmothers. We have continued to see each other and have even went away for a night to St. Louis to see a Cardinals game. I got the tickets from work and I paid for the hotel down there. Michael drove and paid for the gas. It was a nice getaway! I told him though while down there that I still was leery about our relationship. I told him I was scared of letting him get to close because I was afraid of him getting hurt while I am trying to figure out what it is I want. We continued to see each other occasionally and talk or text daily. So here we are coming up on 5 months and I still feel like I don’t know what it is I exactly want. I am still so afraid of hurting him. I don’t want to continue to lead him on and see him get hurt. He truly is one of the nicest guys I have ever met. Why can’t feel this great connection with him. I thought over time it would happen. What is wrong with me??? I finally let him meet Carter and he treats him wonderfully…. I couldn’t ask for anything better. His Grandmother, Aunt, and Mother all have welcomed Carter and I into their lives with open arms. I don’t want to hurt them either. Maybe it's cause we don't spend a lot of time together... since he works at Lowes he has to work alot of nights and weekends, then he has bowling 2 nights a week, then add me working a second job at Lifestar. Plus the fact that he lives at his Grandmothers house and I live at my parents house still we dont' get much alone time. I don't know... Why can’t I decide what it is that is wrong with me. Why don’t I feel this great connection??? He is a wonderful guy… WHY??? I am so scared that maybe we aren't meant for each other and of hurting him in the end.
Well that is about it for now… Not sure how many people read this as I know some have said they lost the link to it, but if you are still reading thank you for toughing it out and reading this entirely to long of a blog entry. ;-)
I hope ya’ all had a very Merry Christmas (Carter and I did) and have a wonderful New Year!!!
Love to all
Michelle
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
December 3rd update
December 3rd update
Well as Christmas is getting near I am no where near ready. On my December 12th paycheck I should hopefully have a little extra cash and be able to go buy some gifts. I have bought Carter two things so far! So it isn’t like I haven’t gotten anything…. ;-)
I called the child support division and reported Dave’s new employer to them. They told me they will get an order to withhold out to them in the mail within 24 hrs and hopefully in about 30 days I will start receiving support again. I just hope Dave sticks with this job and doesn’t quit…. I know wishful thinking huh. They did tell me that I will get part of his income tax refund when he files for back child support. They are also tacking interest onto his late payments too.!!!!
Carter was sick on Thanksgiving…. He had 103.3 temp. Then I thought he was getting better and then on Sunday night he was coughing so bad and could hardly breathe. I almost took him into the ER. I kept him home from school on Monday and took him to prompt care. The Dr. listened to him and all she could hear was wheezing and so she said he had to have a nebulizer treatment first so that it would hopefully clear him up so she could listen better. He had that for 5 minutes and then she listened again and he has bronchitis plus and ear infection. So he is on an antibiotic plus an inhaler. He slept a lot better last night!
Well that is about it for now.
Well as Christmas is getting near I am no where near ready. On my December 12th paycheck I should hopefully have a little extra cash and be able to go buy some gifts. I have bought Carter two things so far! So it isn’t like I haven’t gotten anything…. ;-)
I called the child support division and reported Dave’s new employer to them. They told me they will get an order to withhold out to them in the mail within 24 hrs and hopefully in about 30 days I will start receiving support again. I just hope Dave sticks with this job and doesn’t quit…. I know wishful thinking huh. They did tell me that I will get part of his income tax refund when he files for back child support. They are also tacking interest onto his late payments too.!!!!
Carter was sick on Thanksgiving…. He had 103.3 temp. Then I thought he was getting better and then on Sunday night he was coughing so bad and could hardly breathe. I almost took him into the ER. I kept him home from school on Monday and took him to prompt care. The Dr. listened to him and all she could hear was wheezing and so she said he had to have a nebulizer treatment first so that it would hopefully clear him up so she could listen better. He had that for 5 minutes and then she listened again and he has bronchitis plus and ear infection. So he is on an antibiotic plus an inhaler. He slept a lot better last night!
Well that is about it for now.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Child Support Issues...
Child Support Issues
Okay well Dave is behind almost $900 in child support for Carter… and the amount grows each week as he is not paying me anything at all. Once it hits $1000 they said they can suspend his driver’s license. I hate for that to have to happen as I know he wants to get into over the road truck driving. But, I need help supporting OUR son. Daycare is $70 a week and if the is out of school for a day then I have to add an additional $15 a day. School lunches are $10 a week. I just signed up for my insurance benefits here at work and the price increased a bunch. Then you add on top of that the sports he is in and food, and clothing… The $85 a week that I am supposed to get doesn’t cover ½ of everything.
So I called the Child Support Enforcement Division. I told them that he is now living in Jacksonville, not sure where. I told them that he is working part time as a fry cook at McDonalds. Oh and that is another thing that ticks me off a bit. He can get a decent job and make good money. Yet, he has chosen to work part time at McDonalds as a fry cook. I am sure that he doesn’t make enough to cover child support for his three child support cases he has got. So I hope and pray that he doesn’t file a petition to get it lowered.
He called me today and told me that he is going to go to Spfld, Mo and try the truck driving school there again. He went there in the beginning of Oct and quit after two days. I told him I couldn’t believe they were even going to let him come back. I asked him why since he told me he hated it there… He said he hates it where he is now even more.
Christmas is going to be really small this year all around.
My father and brother can’t get any of the houses they built to sell so their business is going under. If they end up not selling and going to foreclosure they will also take my parents house as it is collateral for one of the spec houses they built.
The stress of money and things is just really getting to me right now…
Okay well Dave is behind almost $900 in child support for Carter… and the amount grows each week as he is not paying me anything at all. Once it hits $1000 they said they can suspend his driver’s license. I hate for that to have to happen as I know he wants to get into over the road truck driving. But, I need help supporting OUR son. Daycare is $70 a week and if the is out of school for a day then I have to add an additional $15 a day. School lunches are $10 a week. I just signed up for my insurance benefits here at work and the price increased a bunch. Then you add on top of that the sports he is in and food, and clothing… The $85 a week that I am supposed to get doesn’t cover ½ of everything.
So I called the Child Support Enforcement Division. I told them that he is now living in Jacksonville, not sure where. I told them that he is working part time as a fry cook at McDonalds. Oh and that is another thing that ticks me off a bit. He can get a decent job and make good money. Yet, he has chosen to work part time at McDonalds as a fry cook. I am sure that he doesn’t make enough to cover child support for his three child support cases he has got. So I hope and pray that he doesn’t file a petition to get it lowered.
He called me today and told me that he is going to go to Spfld, Mo and try the truck driving school there again. He went there in the beginning of Oct and quit after two days. I told him I couldn’t believe they were even going to let him come back. I asked him why since he told me he hated it there… He said he hates it where he is now even more.
Christmas is going to be really small this year all around.
My father and brother can’t get any of the houses they built to sell so their business is going under. If they end up not selling and going to foreclosure they will also take my parents house as it is collateral for one of the spec houses they built.
The stress of money and things is just really getting to me right now…
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
1 year later...
One year ago today is when Dave and I got into a fight about me wanting to go with him to take the kids back to Jacksonville. He told me he needed more "Me Time" and that he thought we needed a break and for me to go stay at my mom and dads. Little did I know then that he wanted more me time cause he was cheating.
I found out on November 10th that he was cheating on me again. My life crashed right before my eyes. I never thought I would survive...
I did survive though! It took a long time. I still remember to this day where I was the first time I realized I hadn't cried yet that day. That was a huge step for me. It took me weeks to get there. My next goal was to go a week without crying.
Now 1 year later I have found that light at the end of the tunnel and climbed out of that dark hole. I am happier now then I have been in a long time.
Yes I do struggle financially now being a single parent and raising Carter on my own. Dave never sees Carter and hasn't provided child support in over a month. So it is very hard to make ends meet, but still I am happy!! Carter is happy too...
As you all know I have met a wonderful guy that I have been seeing for almost 3 months now. I still am taking things slow and haven't introduced him and Carter to each other yet. I think we will be doing that soon though.... sometime this month for sure.
I found out on November 10th that he was cheating on me again. My life crashed right before my eyes. I never thought I would survive...
I did survive though! It took a long time. I still remember to this day where I was the first time I realized I hadn't cried yet that day. That was a huge step for me. It took me weeks to get there. My next goal was to go a week without crying.
Now 1 year later I have found that light at the end of the tunnel and climbed out of that dark hole. I am happier now then I have been in a long time.
Yes I do struggle financially now being a single parent and raising Carter on my own. Dave never sees Carter and hasn't provided child support in over a month. So it is very hard to make ends meet, but still I am happy!! Carter is happy too...
As you all know I have met a wonderful guy that I have been seeing for almost 3 months now. I still am taking things slow and haven't introduced him and Carter to each other yet. I think we will be doing that soon though.... sometime this month for sure.
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